For the first time ever playing Modern Warfare 2 online I came first and beat every obese 11 year old who usually sniggers when they stab me in the back.
I called in chopper gunners and stealth bombers and sentry guns and mopped the airport’s floor with them.
To see my name on top of the list along with the cries of said 11 year olds that I’m apparently a faggot and a queer was enough to give me a horn. Justice.
It was short lived.
Herself let a scream of pain from the bedroom and I found her on the bed. She’d put her back out. Last time this happened I had to take her to hospital for more drugs than your average dealer.
Now she’s on the floor in front of me with her feet up on the couch playing air guitar to Train’s Soul Sister.
Typical, just when we had decided to do a spring clean on the house she “accidentally” puts her back out.
I’ll tell you what love, if you’re well enough to swallow Nurofen like they’re Smarties and play air guitar to songs you demand I play on Youtube, you’re well enough to clean the fucking kitchen.
I have more 11 year olds to put manners on.
On the plus side she still says she’s in too much pain to do anything so I can mess with her and stick my willy anywhere I want.
On the down side, who’s going to make me dinner?
